Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Mac


I joined a new job as a trainee, after my final year, I was a complete fresher, ‘all excited to start anew. It was my first day; I was a bit scared, actually nervous. I kept thinking at the back of my mind how will the people be? Will I be able to fulfil all the responsibilities given to me? Is the boss rude? Are my colleagues strict? (Obviously might be quiet senior to me)...All such questions were wandering and making me feel more freakin’ nervous. Suddenly I could hear someone calling me, “hey are you Adi the new joinee,” I turned around to the direction of the voice calling me and said yes’; the voice was of a girl, who was waving at me...WOW! She was beautiful, I could hear guitar and symphony at the background, that was as if love at first sight. But I composed myself and went towards her, introduced myself. Hi’ ‘m Adi, I just completed my graduation and have joined as a trainee. She smiled and said welcome, I’m Pooja, you can call me “Pu” you will be working with me for next 6 months’. I wanted to jump with joy. Take her in my arms and dance. I knew she must be much elder and senior to me, but, everyone who falls in love knows, love does not discriminate, it knows no rules, it has no boundaries, it is blind, and it is beautiful. One can fall in love anytime with anyone. It just happens. I was really motivated to come to office, she led me to my desk, and she went on and on, assigning a couple of responsibilities to me. I did not interrupt, /I wanted her to keep on talking, listening to her crystal clear melodious voice, which was awesome. I thought I was the luckiest guy on earth. 

It was almost noon, when I was introduced to my other colleagues, my Boss was a mid –aged gentleman. He seemed very ambitious and inspiring. I was as I met a very enthusiastic staff. Now my only objective here was to impress everyone with my talent and work, and also with all my dedication impress “PU”.  I was given a lunch treat by my new colleagues; they made me feel very comfortable. My first day in office was worth a memory. I was winding up for the day, when Pu called me and asked -how will you travel, I replies -by train. She said that she can drop me as my place is just on the way. I did not want to waste time thinking; I just willingly thanked her and was ready to join. She had a Swift desire; it’s one of my favourites’, a good car in good budget. On the way we hardly spoke anything, but I was happy with her company.

Days passed, I enjoyed office, I got to learn a lot during my training period, meanwhile, I also started knowing PU’ more and more. We became good friends, I now knew that she had a Boyfriend and his name was Mac. I had seen his picture on her desk. Lucky’ guy (smiles). I still loved her. And made sure, she doesn’t get a hint about it. After work our only discussion was “Mac” Pu used to share everything about Mac every day. Sometimes, she used to leave work early to meet him. Pu said, Mac and she never fight. They had fought only once and that was the last time. From then Pu has promised not to fight. I used to notice that Pu’ had a twinkle in her eyes when Mac’s mother used to call her, she used to enjoy talking to his mom. I could see and feel the love she had for Mac.

One day we were working late on Friday’, apart from us there were a couple of our colleagues’. It was around 9.00 PM, I was almost done, I went to Pu’s desk, she was still on with her laptop, I asked her if it will take time. She replied in her usual melodious tone, “No’ Adi, are you getting late? Wait for an hour I will be done and we will leave together, I will drop you.” There was no reason for me to say “No” I was bonkers over her, I was ready to be with her all my life, if not MAC’. I was not jealous, coz’ I loved her so much and would always respect her love of life.  We almost left at 11.30 PM. It was a cool, breezy drive with the window panes down and the roads with no traffic.  As usual she was talking about Mac, and went on and on. I enjoyed listening and being with her. I reached home. I did not sleep that whole night, I was just thinking about her. I felt like telling her once how much she means to me. But I was scared, I did not want to risk my friendship for love. We were good friends and Pu’ trusted me a lot. I knew I will never be able to tell her my feelings. Night passed with Pu’s thoughts.

17th October’2006, Tuesday, I did not see PU in office, I tried calling her, and her phone was switched off. I left a message on her phone to call back. I could not concentrate on work; I was waiting for, when the office boy got a note for me. The Note read “Hi Adi’, I will not be in office today, it is Mac’s Birthday, so we are out celebrating together, I will call you at 3.00 PM.” I was happy that she is safe and enjoying, but I missed her terribly, I was just looking at my watch and phone. I was just waiting for her to call. I could just hear nobody. I messed me with my work that day, my boss was a bit annoyed. But, he guided me, helped me to understand my mistakes. I apologised, I knew I was wrong, coz’ I was only thinking about her and not concentrating on work. It was 3:00 PM and she had still not called, I looked at my phone, as if I’m gonna’ crush it into pieces; I wanted to, just hear her once. It was almost 5:00 PM and she still din call. I wanted to go to her house and meet her, but that would be so crazy, she might not like it. I left home alone. My heart was heavy, I wanted to cry, I wanted to hate her, which I could never. I had nothing to eat the whole day, my head was reeling, and I was feeling very uneasy. I reached home, cried in my bed, staying alone; I had no one to console me. I called my “MOM”; I wanted her to be next to me so badly. I called her and spoke to her. Of’ course, I couldn't share the reason for being upset.I just told her I had a bad day; as usual she gave me comfort with her sweet and kind words. She told me to come home; she was missing me, so was I. I decided to visit her this weekend.  I was feeling much better talking to her. I got up really late next day, I had kept my Phone on silent, so missed a couple of calls, one call was from PU’, I did not call her back.

I reached late to office, almost second half.  Pu’ came to my desk with some chocolates and Cake, she said sorry for not calling the day before. She said she was very busy and enjoyed, every moment being with Mac. I was happy for her, even after what I went through the day before. We went together for Coffee that evening, over a coffee chat she told that she missed dropping me yesterday’ I was very happy to hear that, my heart melted out for her, I was happy with the fact that, though she was with Mac she missed me. I told her I wanted to meet Mac the Lucky guy in her life. She was quiet, there was complete silence for a couple of minutes, when I interrupted the moment and said’ It’s O.K, PU, I know there are some guys who would not like their girlfriends to have a guy as a best friend, I understand. You don’t worry; I just casually asked to meet him. She just walked away, without saying a word. She did not spoke to me till Friday noon, I wanted to leave early, so I pinged her on her laptop, she did not reply. I had to wait for her permission to leave home. I was going to my Mom’s place as decided. I was about to get up from my chair and go to her desk, when I found her standing next to me. She said, “Hey Adi’ can you cancel your trip for today, I wanted you to meet Mac tomorrow morning” I agreed, I did not want to say “No” to her, as usual.  I called my Mom, and informed her.

21st October’2013, Saturday Morning, I will never forget this day. I met “PU” on the highway; she was dressed in a white shirt and pale blue jeans, WOW! she looked awesome. I wanted to hug and kiss her. She drove me through some very unusual lane, I was thinking how to react or introduce myself when I meet Mac. I was preparing myself when the car stopped. We both got down and when I was still thinking, I noticed we had stopped in front of a graveyard. I had too many questions to ask PU’ but before I could say anything, PU, smiled and asked me to follow her, she took me to a grave. It was written “17th October’1984 - 17th October’2004, Mac Fernandes”. I really did not know how to react, but PU’ went on, she said, “My friends and my family think he is dead, but he will always be alive with me in my heart. He is my strength, my love, my only reason to be happy in life. Pu Continued- It was 17th October’2004 we had gone  to a resort , with some of our close friends to celebrate Mac’s Birthday, one of my friend Rinny was trying to get very close to him, which I did not like, and we had a small argument, actually I’m very possessive about Mac’. We were going to be officially engaged next month. Our family was happy with our relation.

I knew he only loves me but I still had an argument, I din spoke to him for an hour or so, but I wanted to make up for what went wrong so I decided to say sorry and patch up. But, when I came to meet him in the room he had gone swimming with friends. I was waiting for him at the resort beach, I could see him swimming, I ran towards him, he came out and hugged me, I insisted him to stay back with me, however, he did not listen to me, this time he went swimming, and never came back. I waited and waited, my friends informed the police and our family. The police sent a search party, however, they could not find his body, and they continued their search...”
I was in tears; I did not want to know any further. I hugged her. She had no tears in her eyes, cos’ for her, Mac was alive. I bow to this love, I will always love PU, the way she loved Mac. 

I found a new meaning for love, Love is always alive, even death can’t separate the one you love.

I drove and dropped her home. 
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Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Tum Nahi Hote Tho... Hum Kya The!

Jhoka hawa ka, halki si hasi
Aankhen num, aur dil me meethe jazbaat
Zindagi ka ye naya rang b kya kamaal ka tha….

Kasmoshiyan  bateein karne lagi thi
Zindagi itni khoobsurat  kabhi na thi
Hum bas hum na rahe…Ye humne jaane, jab tumhe paya,
Dosti b tum, tum hi pyar
Bas aapse yehi kehna hai ek baar
Tum Nahi hote tho…hum Kya the
Tum Nahi Hote tho…Hum Kya the

Mili Umer bhar ki dosti, beshumaar pyar.
Isi ka naam hai Sansaar
Ye safar , safar na hota
‘Gar tum jaisa humsafar na hota
Hum tumarha shukriya na kar payenge,
Shabdo me b na likh payenge…
Humari zindagi tum pe vaar…
Bas aapse yehi  kehna hai ek baar
Tum Nahi hote tho…hum Kya the

Tum Nahi Hote tho…Hum Kya the

-Anu
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Monday, January 13, 2014

You wanted to come...(Tribute to the Born...Unborn!)

You wanted to come...You wanted to come...
You wanted to see the ray of light...
You wanted to feel the touch of air...
You wanted to listen to the whispers of love...
You wanted to gift me the world of joy...
You wanted to give birth to a Mother...
You wanted to give me a New life...


'Shattered are the dreams of you, When I 'Betrayed and Slayed you...
You just wanted to give and live the love...

You wanted to Come...You wanted to Come
You wanted to Come to give me a New Life!

'M evil, an experience of fear
And My selfless love for me ,made me killed the feeling of loving by you...
An experience of being a Mother was forever destroyed...

You wanted to come...You wanted to come
You wanted to Come Just for Me!
Forgive me wherever you are in the Stars...Forgive me forever...
Now I know and understand - You wanted to come...You wanted to come...

You wanted to Come Only for Me!


Note: Never miss the Experience of being a Mother, Do not abort a Child!

- Anu


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